Unsolved Mysteries...

Why is it that you have to lose something to realize just how much its worth?

Some "Advice" From Cosmo...

I almost choked on my morning coffee when I read this (I swear Cosmo, sometimes you just make it too easy for them):

Body Language Decoder: He Prefers Woman on Top Sex

"According to our survey, 53% of men prefer this chick-in-charge pose. These playful guys are always looking to have a good time, but they still know how to be attentive. Pleasing you is a priority, which is why they prefer a position that best allows you to achieve orgasm."
-Cosmopolitan

Riiight, because sprawling out his limp limbs and letting his eyes roll to the back of his head is what you call "being attentive". How coincidental that the best position for my orgasm, is also the one that he needs to do the least work for.

(side-eye)

THIS IS A LAZY MAN'S POSITION LADIES! And I'm shocked - especially at Cosmo with 50 years of of sex journalism under it's belt - that we are STILL falling for this crap! Well, guess what?! There are A TON of ways that you can achieve orgasm without twisting your ankle or busting a hip, they just don't want you to know that because it'll mean that they'll actually have to attend to you and do something. Don't make it easy for them girls, if you want to treat him, cool, but don't let him get away without treating you first.

(Although, points for thinking it up boys, it is a good one)

Words of Wisdom...

"Like I've always said, love wouldn't be blind if the braille wasn't so damned fun."

-Anonymous

F.Y.I.

There’s nothing like that feeling that a girl gets when she catches a guy stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of her. But guys, there is a fine line between appreciating a pretty girl and being a pervert, and just because you’re at a temporary loss for words doesn’t mean you can just let your instincts take over. There is just some behavior that is unacceptable, so wipe your drool and listen up:

1) Never stare a girl up and down and say something nasty like “Damn, whats up sexy?”
2) Never lick your lips and rub your hands at her saying “Mmm, mmm, mmm!”
3) Never let your hands follow your eyes and try to reach out for her.

Your a man, your instincts are ape-like, we know, but unfortunately for you we do not live in the jungle so please stop acting like a dirty animal and learn some manners.

Rant!

Ok, so on the last ‘Dear Diary’ I posted, I questioned if having a scandalous dream about someone other than your partner could be considered ‘cheating’. Now, obviously, the answer to that is NO since, after all, we can’t exactly be held responsible for what happens in our subconscious. But as one reader proposed in their comment, a more realistic, and definitely more problematic question regarding the issue is whether or not masturbating to the thought of someone else should be considered cheating? Interesting since here there’s no excuse to fall back on being that it’s a highly conscious activity. So, is it?

My immediate thought was no way, fantasy is a huge part of sexual pleasure for a lot of people, and its ok because it’s imaginary. Some use porn, some have celebrity crushes, some even like those hot little Japanime characters with the tight cat suits, extra long pig-tails and swinging nun-chucks (hey, whatever floats your boat) - the point is, it doesn’t really matter whose picture you use to masage your muscle because at the end of the day, they’re not real, so no harm done, right?
Well, as my girlfriend pointed out to me, you can’t always assume that it’s a question of fantasy, when sometimes it can be very real. Like if you’re thinking/using a picture of a friend, or someone you saw on Facebook, or even, gasp, an ex. Surely then some kind of line is being crossed. And if it’s not to be considered physical cheating (which is arguable), then at the very least it’s emotional, right? That put me back a bit, a very good point indeed. When you put it that way I can see how that could hurt a relationship.

But then I thought wait a minute, is it really fair to put this kind of pressure on someone who’s just trying to have a little fun? Unless they’re fantasies are going way beyond momentary physical satisfaction and into something more, then I don’t think so. I mean, do I really need to feel guilty about thinking of whatever it is that I want/need to think about to get me in the mood? Especially if the only place it’s being played out (and the only place that I intend to play it out) is within the confines of my imagination - somewhere I know for a fact that my significant other can’t otherwise access unless I tell him? I don’t think so. It seems ridiculous infact. That picture of Daniel Craig in my underwear drawer, or that memory of that amazing night up at the lake two years ago not only ensures my own sexual satisfaction, but yours too, so can you please explain to me again why this is a bad thing?

Ugh, then again who knows, maybe I’m just being too insensitive.

Words of Wisdom...

You know that feeling you get when you're putting everything you have into a relationship and just aren't getting anything back? When your head says you need to leave, but your heart says you should stay? Well, this classic by Tracy Chapman explains that feeling perfectly. Sometimes saying goodbye is actually saying "I love you".

"Give Me One Reason"
Give me one reason to stay here
And I'll turn right back around (x2)
Because I don't want leave you lonely
But you got to make me change my mind

Baby I got your number and I know that you got mine
But you know that I called you, I called too many times
You can call me baby, you can call me anytime
But you got to call me

Give me one reason to stay here
And I'll turn right back around (x2)
Because I don't want leave you lonely
But you got to make me change my mind

I don't want no one to squeeze me, they might take away my life (x2)
I just want someone to hold me and rock me through the night

This youthful heart can love you and give you what you need (x2)
But I'm too old to go chasing you around
Wasting my precious energy

Give me one reason to stay here
And I'll turn right back around (x2)
Because I don't want leave you lonely
But you got to make me change my mind

Baby just give me one reason, Give me just one reason why
Baby just give me one reason, Give me just one reason why I should stay
Because I told you that I loved you
And there ain't no more to say

Unsolved Mysteries...

Why is that once you think you've got it all figured out, something (or someone) unexpectedly comes along and has you re-evaluating everything?

Totally frustrating, and yet totally intriguing...

Dear Diary...

Is it cheating if I have a scandalous dream about someone other than my boyfriend?

5 Signs Your Relationship Isn't Going Anywhere...

I think its pretty safe to say that the beginning of a relationship is the most fun part of the whole thing right? Not necessarily because the rest is boring but because during the early stages everything is just so new and exciting. So when a friend recently told me that they were dating someone knew, I really didn’t expect to hear anything but good things when I asked how it was going. Unfortunately, before he could even finish what he was saying I already knew this relationship was doomed. Now, I’m not trying to be pessimistic here, and in no way do I consider myself to be any kind of authority when it comes to relationships, but what I heard the first 45 seconds of his answer sounded, to me anyway, like pretty obvious signs that this isn’t going to go very far. But you be the judge:

1) The first reason he listed as to why he's with her is because she’s attractive.

2) He stalled when it came to thinking of another.

3) Before he could think of a second reason, he came up with complaints about her.

4) One month in, and he’s already trying to change (and make excuses for) her behavior.

5) His friends are all telling him not to bother with her.

Like I said, I’m no expert (and, it is true that no one really knows your relationship as well as you do), but you can't completely ignore these signs either. Now, there is a reason why I’m putting his business out here for everyone to see, and it's because I actually think that there is something useful to take away from it - and this is an educational blog after all (haha, yeah right). Seriously though, I think that this is a pretty good guideline to use in evaluating relationships, you know, when something about it just doesn't feel right and you start to wonder if it's a waste of your time. And while it might seem rash to break up over some of these issues individually, when you put them together like this, it’s kind of hard to argue other wise. So think about it, and try to look at the big picture while you do it, because there is nothing worse than settling for someone you’re just ok with while the one who could change life is out there looking for you.